Auto Apple Music play frustration

Can anybody please help I am at my wits end with Apple Music auto play, every time I get into either of my two vehicles my CarPlay starts up my Apple Music starts playing I’ve tried everything even setting up a shortcut to pause it and that doesn’t work the double loop in Apple Music is greyed out so that doesn’t work either I’ve looked into the CarPlay menu to see if I can remove it from the add or remove list in the apps section in CarPlay and I can’t delete it from my phone or CarPlay the only way I’ve found to stop auto play is to delete the app from my phone altogether and reinstall it if I want to use it why oh why should we be forced to have Apple Music playing as a default It should be optional android devices don’t do this to there users who the **** thought this option was a great idea so now I have the inconvenience of reinstalling it then deleting it each time